Held Together

Lindsey in London || Day 36

I am in a foreign country. You've probably caught that.

But so far, I've kept it together quite well. Well, actually that’s a lie. My Father, my ever-loving and oh so patient Savior keeps me together, while I stand by, helpless to tears and wondering if I should just keep sleeping.

I am a homebody. Tied at the hip to my family. Comfortable in coffee shops with window seats. I wrestle with a powerful fear of loneliness. I haven’t traveled the world before. I have trouble reading maps.

And here I am, feeling a peace there’s no WAY I could come up with on my own, a joy that absolutely, positively will not fade, even if the smiling thing does panic the Brits, and over and over God introduces his love in the form of what were once strangers.

Not to say I haven’t had any issues. That would be a big, fat lie. This weekend has been the hardest yet. My brother, my best bud who is hysterically funny and sometimes dances to Justin Bieber with me, graduated boot camp. Ask me how many monumental moments I've missed of my brother’s. The answer is none. Not one. My job as a sideline cheerleader began the day he started t-ball and I haven’t let it go because it’s one of my favorite jobs in the world. Not being there to see him in his uniform broke my heart over and over. Letting go of him again, this time for an indefinite amount of time, is breaking my heart, over and over.

But you know what? I’m still held together. I don’t look it. But inside, there is an incredible excitement for that kid because he is on fire with truth and his arms are wide open and will touch all he comes in contact with, and goodness HOW MUCH will he be used.

You know what else? God is overcompensating. This week, I got a message from a girl I met in passing. We got coffee and turns out she is an absolutely precious human. We’re friends. A day later, I got to see a girl who absolutely glows, one I haven’t seen in four years, and in London of all places. And she encouraged my heart until I could do nothing but be in total awe of how perfectly God knows me. Today, I went to church by myself and walked out of service with another sweet soul who came to church flying solo. We explored London with a lot of joy and a lot of good food, and her roommate even joined the adventure too.

That’s a lot of friends for a foreign country. That’s a lot of being taken care of.

And that's just the last three days.

I don’t know what’s pulling you apart, or breaking your heart, or making you feel as if you’re lost in a foreign place, but I am so burdened to tell you that you are extravagantly loved, wildly pursued, and so watched over by the one who can hold you together.

Let Him overcompensate on your behalf. I’m challenging you to watch for all the things that you can’t make happen, but they land in your lap anyway. All the beautiful miracles headed your way, see them for what they are, an intense Love that cannot be touched or changed by circumstances or your insecurities or how well you read maps.

Oh, how He loves.